The Cranial Archives

Pumpkin Spice and Everything Nice

Fall is in the air, and we're celebrating harvest season with a fresh crop of rules questions from our inbox. Join us in this week's pumpkin-spiced issue of Cranial Insertion!

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Grilling, Chilling, and Quizzing

With summer grilling season in full swing, Moko wants to cook your brains with a fiendish quiz. Do you have what it takes to answer these questions? Find out in this week's quizzical episode of Cranial Insertion!

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From Phyrexia With Love

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Resistance is futile. We want you.

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Double Double Masters

Double, double toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble with a delicious stew of rules questions. Come and see what we're cooking for our first look at Double Masters 2022 in this week's exciting issue of Cranial Insertion!

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Beholdering Baldur's Gate

There are many things in Baldur's Gate to behold, like Gates, Dragons, and Beholders, oh my!

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Dancing in the Streets of New Capenna

Summer's (almost) here and the time is right for dancing in the Streets of New Capenna! Join us as we journey from Where The Streets Have No Name to Easy Street in this week's street-smart episode of Cranial Insertion!

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Rules and Gabigools

While celebrating Mother's Day at a local restaurant, Andrew encountered a mob boss and made him an offer he couldn't understand. Find out what happened next and join us in this week's exciting episode of Cranial Insertion!

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Snakes!? Snaaaaaaaaaakes!

The Cranial Insertion office has been infested with snakes! Snakes! Why does it always have to be snakes? We're not quite sure, but we've asked Moko to take care of the situation so that we can go ahead and answer your rules questions. Join us in this week's snaketacular edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Holidazed and Confused

The holidays are arriving in full force! We are decorating the halls and preparing our studios, Moko is especially excited in hopes he can finally get that new set of bones he has wanted! We have put yet another fantastic article together to fulfill all your rules question needs to take you through all the exciting times. So join us in this delightfully decorative edition of Cranial Insertion!

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November Rain

Welcome to the jungle, we got fun and games! We got everything you want, all those rules questions and answers. So we jump on the nightrain to head down toward Paradise City where the grass is green. By now you have probably run out of patience for those answers and thus will need to read on, sweet child o' mine, in this week's edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Happy Spooktober!

October has arrived and so has Innistrad Midnight Haunt! So we have broken out our best costumes and decked ourselves out to answer those pesky rules questions! So join us as we scare up yet another fantastic article and read on in this weeks exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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You See An Inn

The Dungeons and Dragons prereleases are in the books. So we have packed an exciting article chock full of those pesky rules questions that had you lost on your delve into the dungeon this past weekend. Read on in this week's adventurous edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Moko's Sweet Sixteen

This article has spent sixteen years in the making! It is the CI anniversary article, and we have jam packed this edition with all of the answers to those pesky rules questions you have! So join us as we get our party hats on and celebrate in this exciting edition of Cranial Insertion! Now with more balloons!

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Jumping on the Banned Wagon

Wizards has dropped a doozy of a ban announcement, and we go over some of the impacts of that announcement in answer to your rules questions! So join us for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion now with mode deck diversity than ever!

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Legendary Leftovers

The legend continues as we take a peek at some of those fantastical cards coming from the new set Commander Legends! With all of that legendary might pulling its weight around you have more questions than ever, so we have broken out the big guns this week and put out mettle to the test to once again answer all of those questions to satisfy your curiosity. So join us for this week's legendary edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Bingewatching

With flu season approaching and Coronavirus being an ongoing problem, we at Cranial Insertion are spending more time indoors, which gives us the opportunity to catch up on our favorite TV shows and to answer your rules questions. Join us for this week's watchful edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Anticlockwisdom

Halloween is past us and we are chancing our clocks and settling in with all of those letters you are sending us to answer yet another set of those rules questions you have burning. So join us for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion, now with one extra hour!

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Back to School, 5th Edition

It is that time again, dust off your textbooks, buy some new notebooks, pencils, erasers, pens, and all those other supplies to gear up and gain some knowledge! The same goes for us here at the CI offices, we have prepares some lovely information to help educate you in the rules of Magic, so you can go forth and conquer all of your foes! So join us for this weeks didactic edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Double, double toil and trouble

When witches brew double the trouble, when writers brew double the articles!

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Dogs and Cats, and Dinosaurs, Oh My!

Somewhere over the rainbow, the latest cards have arrived from Jumpstart! So we take a moment to answer all of your questions from the latest and greatest. Pay no mind to the the happenings beyond the curtain. No there certainly is not a zombie monkey behind the curtain, just look over here at all the great rules questions being answered! Join us for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion.

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CI's Secret Lair Search

The secret lair has started and now we have begun to reveal all of those hidden secrets within the rules! Secrets that your heart has long desired! Secrets that many would want to know, if only there was a way for them to access them across some sort of inter-sharable-visual-filigree of computational things; alas, for those who deign to learn the secrets within read on in this week's information filled edition of Cranial Insertion!

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This Title Is Now a 3/3 Elk Creature

+2: Create a Food token or you could just make an Elk. Read on in this week's 3/3 edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Cabin Fever

From out in the wilderness we have managed to cobble together yet another article with all of the survival skills you are going to need in order to navigate the Magic landscape. So join us once again as we endure the wonderful questions and answers of this weeks Cranial Insertion!

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A Slice of Pi

Round and round she goes where she stops nobody knows! At least three times around with only one turn, though we did have to ask Moko at least four times to respond once to our five general inquiries about this week's article. So lets put everything together and get to it in this week's annular edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Going Horizontal

Modern Horizons is on the horizon and we have aligned our inbox with all of your questions. So once again we have put together a most contemporary collection of answers to those questions you have burning on your mind! So read on in this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Cranial Insertion's Memorial Day Sale

As we take some time to remember the fallen here in the US we also take some time to hit the shops and to build up our supplies to continue the fight! So read on as we answer all of those stubborn rules questions in this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Spring into Action

Spring time is here once again and boy do we have the answer to all of those winder blues you are trying to shake off! So join us in all the exciting glory and detail that is this weeks edition of Cranial Insertion! Now if only I can find out what Moko is doing with all those springs.

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Sponsored by the Senate

This week's article as part of paragraph 12 subsection 21, in conjunction with the defined rules of article writing on Ravnica paragraph 17 subsection 15, following the additional federated rules of publications paragraph 532 subsection 9, pursuing to the by-laws of electronic transmission of written works paragraphs 21, 42, and 73 subsections 51, 34, and 12, in accordance with the regulations for disseminating truthful information to the populace paragraphs 71 and 432 subsections 83 and 27, along with the addendum to the statues of communication using non magical means paragraph 68 subsections 28 and 21 under the ordinances of the use of physical interactions as defined by the universe paragraphs 900 and 2135 subsections 31 and 56 set forth by the guidelines as stated in recent memoranda to the laws and statues of the plane of Ravnica we the Azorious Senate hereby condemn the article known as Cranial Insertion and anyone who considers reading it as unfit for consumption based upon the illegibility and flagrant use of zombified monkeys throughout. Those caught considering reading such content will be subject to punitive action to the fullest extent set forth by the laws listed as well as any other applicable laws set forth and pursuant to but not limited to those listed by the Azorious Senate.

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My Punny Valentine

Valentines Day is around the corner here in the US and we are getting the ones we love all the answers to their burning rules questions. So gather your flowers, chocolates, and blankets and cozy up to the fire with your loved ones for the night and read on in this weeks dearest edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Happy Equiznox

It is that time of year again! That is right, time to reset your clocks and fall back one hour! Wait, did you think there was going to be another quiz article!!? Well, okay then I suppose we cannot get one by you, which is why this article will be a breeze for you to get all of the correct answers! So to prove your hypothesis correct and begin the ability to boast amongst all your friends about how superior your intellect is read on in this week's inquizitive edition of Cranial Insertion!

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School's in Session

Summer is nearing its end, and schools in the US have started a new school year, so let's open our textbooks and answer all your rules questions. Read on and join us for this week's particularly educational episode!

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Lucky Thirte'en

Luck is on our side as we pass over the 13th day of the month which happened to be a Friday, a bad omen in some places but not here!!! We have luck on our side, or perhaps it was just all the answers to all the right questions! Regardless read on to get all the answers you need in this week’s fortuitous edition of Cranial Insertion!

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A Taxing Time of Year

Need some tax relief, well have we got something for you! This week’s latest fresh off the press edition of Cranial Insertion! So join us for a bit of a distraction from all those pesky forms and regulations to turn all your rules questions into a nice refund!

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Spring Forward

Switching up the clocks and springing forward an hour, so with less sleep we are bringing you as many answers to your questions that we could jam into out 23 hour day! So join us for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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My Zombie Valentine

Hello and welcome again! Once again we have this year's Valentine article filled with all of the love and happiness that we can possibly jam into a single article! Or at least as much as any Zombie Monkey can exude. So join us once again for all the rules questions and answers you know and love! <3

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Quiz Wars

That is no small moon over there, it is just a Wheel of Sun and Moon! This week we have for you an exciting set of questions to challenge your Magic rules senses, in another one of our exciting quiz episodes! So come and tickle your fancy, just watch out for that giant fuzzball over there (Moko just glued a bunch of fur to his bones) as we journey onward in this week's Silver bordered edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Release the Icons!

Iconic Masters is close at hand, so we take a look at some of the most iconic questions in our inbox! All the while we try to provide masterful answers to those questions, in this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion! Now with 20% more icons to storm castles with.

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Everybody Walk the Dinosaur

We're still adventuring on the plane of Ixalan, and we're celebrating the Dinosaurs and other interesting cards that this set has to offer, so join us as we fill your brains with rules knowledge and song lyrics in this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Back to School, 3rd Edition

School is back in session and we are here to teach you the lessons regarding Magic rules that you asked for! So join us for yet another information packed class of Cranial Insertion!

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Just a Phase We're Going Through

Commander 2017 is our and we have once again phased back into during our untap in order to answer your rules questions and answers! So join us for this weeks exciting edition of Cranial Insertion! Now all we need to figure out is how to stop our office fro phasing out again.

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A Break from the Sand

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Back to Normality

Done with our jaunt into the world of Archenemy and the twisting turns of the mind of Nicol Bolas we once again bring you back to Amonkhet for some more rules questions and answers of your design! So join us once again for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Just Deserts

Amonkhet is out in the wild, fresh off the Pro Tour in Nashville this past weekend we take a look at those burning questions you have had. So we sit down for another helping of rules questions to help satiate your appetite for knowledge! So join us for this weeks rather delicious edition of Cranial Insertion! Now with more Strawberries!

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Presents for Mummy

Mother's Day is coming up this weekend, and we're celebrating early with our resident mummy Moko by giving you another selection of Magic rules questions from Amonkhet and elsewhere. Join us for this week's fun-filled and only slightly mummified edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Spring has Sprung

Spring time is here once again and we have started to clean out our mail box. That means more Magic rules questions answered for your curious minds! So join us as we jump full on into this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Let's Do the Time Warp Again!

At it once again warping around the multiverse in search of the perfect storm of rules questions to answer! So join us in song and dance for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion! Now with more callbacks, just watch out for the Meatloaf.

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A Valentine's Day Pop Quiz

Love is in the air, and we knew what you would really love is to test your knowledge of the rules of Magic! So this week we bring you yet another quiz article where you can challenge yourself and your valentine! So join us for this weeks quizzical edition of Cranial Insertion!

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A Consular matter

Pull out the red carpet because the ambassador has come to town! Just be sure to keep the supples of aether away so as not to burn the house down! We continue on this week with more of your burning questions from Aether Revolt. So join us in this week's diplomatic edition of Cranial Insertion!

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See Your Tomorrow, Today!

Scrying into the future I see... all your rules questions answered by this week's fortuitous article! So join us for this weeks foretelling edition of Cranial Insertion!

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The Hitchhiker's Guide to Kaladesh

Time to solve the puzzles of life, the universe, and everything! Oh, wait they did that already and the answer was 42?! Oh, well I suppose we will go back to solving all of those rules riddles and puzzles that you have continuously sent in to our offices! So join us for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Ach-tober

October is here and Kaladesh has released! So we bring you a fresh set of your invented questions straight from the forges of the Internet or wherever else you sent them from! So join us for this week's exciting edition of Cranial Insertion!

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Back to School, 2nd Edition

Everywhere in the U.S. of A kids are returning back to the grind of school. So we bring you an extra special educational helping of your rules questions and answers, right here for your enjoyment! So join us for this exciting academic edition of Cranial Insertion!

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